Apr 20, 2010

How to Calm Your Worry

There’s no doubt- during life- we can’t avoid from being worried. It can annoy your quality of life if you can’t face your fears properly. In her article, Stacey Colino described six most common fears and the strategies to calm it. I think it will help a lot.

1.Worry: Job Security
The reality: In an uncertain economy, employment is far from a sure thing, so it's easy to wonder if your position may be eliminated.

You're most vulnerable if: You've been laid off from a job before or someone close to you was fired unexpectedly.

What to do:
Grounding yourself in day-to-day reality is a good way to avoid stressing. Try to keep a close eye on how your company is doing financially so you can estimate the possibility of layoffs.
Meet with your boss to learn what you can do to solidify your position. Discuss what projects you should be working on and which skills and responsibilities you should be developing.

It has gone too far when: You are constantly stressing over your job performance. In this case, overly perfectionist tendencies could be to blame, and you may want to discuss this issue with a therapist.

2.Worry: The State of Your Relationship
The reality
: Relationships are full of challenges, particularly as the years together add up.

You’re most vulnerable if: You’ve ever been betrayed by a lover, you have lasting fears of rejection, or you grew up in a broken family. Unsettled issues can end up projected onto a spouse and cause a wave effect.

What to do:
Take stock of your relationship by asking yourself how often you’re frustrated or upset with your partner and in what situations this typically happens.
Write down your thoughts. Getting your worries on paper helps you evaluate them with a clearer head.
Consider how realistic your concerns are and whether you could be projecting unrelated anxieties onto the relationship.
Find a calm time to talk to your partner, being honest but not confrontational.

It has gone too far when: You take each squabble as a sign your relationship is faltering, or you’ve stopped enjoying time you spend with your partner. For help in talking things through, consider couples counseling. Or if the problem rests mostly with you, see a therapist on your own.

3.Worry: The Safety and Wellbeing of Your Children
The reality: There’s plenty to be anxious about. Because you love your children, it’s natural that you want to protect them from harm and heartache, and it can be hard to accept that you can’t completely control everything. In fact, some worry or concern is probably a sign of good parenting.

You’re most vulnerable if: Your child had a serious illness or accident, or he has a chronic health condition. Or if you were neglected during your childhood, you could be overcompensating by constantly worrying.

What to do:
Find a pediatrician you trust and can talk to openly. Most pediatricians are used to parents who worry and a big part of their job is to help parents figure out what’s worth worrying about and what isn’t.
With worries that aren’t related to health―if your child is struggling with math or having a conflict with a friend―ask yourself whether there’s an action you can take to deal with the situation. Does your child need a tutor? Could talking to a therapist help him better manage difficult friendships? If a solution presents itself, try it. You have to learn to accept uncertainty. It helps if you recognize that kids are ‘tough’. They have to learn how to fall down to learn how to get up.

It has gone too far when: Worrying about your children interferes with your own life―if you’re losing sleep or if it’s hurting your relationship. Ask about the possibility of seeing an anxiety expert.

I’ll divide this topic into two posts. Next post will mention other three worries. See you…

Source: realsimple.com
Image source:leejagers.wordpress.com

3 komentar:

Ana Cristina April 20, 2010  

Nice tips!! thanks for sharing!

Yen April 20, 2010  

I can realte to this topic about relationship. wooohhh..Indeed true Some aspect in lives are just too prone to worry about. especially in a relationship and in the financial aspect. I can relate more on the relationship. Thank you for such a good topic here.

imelda April 20, 2010  

these things can not be avoided in life indeed. it is a matter of how one copes with the present situation. It is hard to be a parent, many things are best said than done

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